Saturday, November 17, 2012

4 Months with Lisfranc

Its been four months with my injury.  I will start by saying how thankful I am to have had such an amazing surgeon and physical therapist.  I made great improvements in my two month of therapy, but now that is over.  Both told me that the rest will just take time and no promises about anything.........

At this point I am a bit discouraged, I thought I would be able to do more than what I am.  I still feel pain with every step I take, it isn't physically debilitating but emotionally it is draining.  I can not lift on just my left foot, can't go up on my tip toes with just my left foot.  I still can not wear anything but sneakers, and in the mornings when pain is the worst, I have to wear a sneaker or the pain is too much.   I don't go super fast either.  UGH, I just feel down.  I expected to be so much further than what I am now.

BUT! I can crouch down on my toes (this was discovered just today), go up and down stairs with little difficulty, walk long distances, stand long times.  Normal life is resumed.  Well as much normal as it can be.  The limp is almost completely gone which is great, things are still improving, just at a much slower pace now.  There is more I can do then can't do which is something to be so thankful for! 

I wish, hope, and pray, that I am able to run again.  Oh how I loved running.  It was what I did in college to help with the stress of school work and such.  I took it for granted and made excuses for not running, oh how I wish I could take back those excuses.  But looking back will not help me continue to move forward.

I am able to do the bike and I will be trying the elliptical soon.  I can walk on the treadmill so I have to concentrate on what I can do. 

I was told that improvement will begin to slow and it will take 8 to 12 months for complete recovery, and even then, I will always deal with residual pain and such.  That scares me sometimes, espically now that progress is slowing.  I wonder about having the two screws removed and if I will need another surgery in the future.  I wonder just what I will and won't be able to do.....

I am proud of myself though.....I push through the pain....I keep going....I don't use it as an excuse...I just keep going.  I have in the past just shut down...not this time.  I have found a new strength in this injury, strength I didn't know I had inside.  I use the pain to motivate, to be  a better person, and to prove that I am strong and will deal with whatever challenge is placed in my way.  It dosent mean I don't have bad days, I have had a few good cry sessions, but then I pick myself up and move forward. 

I promised myself I would be a success story, and I am going to be!

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Its Been 3 Months Since Lisfranc Struck

I thought October would never come.......
When I was first diagnosed with the Lisfranc ligament tear and was told I wouldn't be walking until late September, (that was in July) it sounded so far away.  I am happy to report that I am walking part time in the boot and part time in sneakers.  Exactly three months after the fall.

I can happily report that I am making lots of progress.  In just four weeks time I have gone from using two crutches and the orthopedic boot, to half sneakers half boot.  AMAZING!  I must attribute my success to my physical therapist; this guy is amazing and knows exactly what exercises my foot needs to become stronger with each visit.

I have great days, good days, and bad days.  Unfortunately I do have a good deal of pain on a daily basis but it isn't debilitating. Its annoying I will admit and some days, like today, I do get frustrated with the pain.  I try to remember that it is still very early on in my recovery and that it always could be worse, but really....who wants to feel pain everyday.  I do get scared wondering if this is the pain I will experience from now on, but its just to early to tell.  Hopefully as I get stronger and time goes by the pain will subside.

On Monday I was able to go the whole day with just sneakers, but then I paid for that on Tuesday.  Then today I was able to do just sneakers again, but was uncomfortable.  I am trying to push myself through the pain but I listen to my body and when it gets to a point that I feel tears coming on, I have surpassed my limit and I take it easy for awhile.  I do not want to use the boot as a "crutch" and give into the pain all the time, but I think there are some moments when I push myself too much.

I have just over two weeks left of physical therapy and then I will be on my own.  Total recovery is 8 to 12 months.  I move forward knowing I have made great progress and will continue to do all that I can to be healthy and strong in the future.

Monday, October 1, 2012

Finally Feeling Independent

Today was a big day for me that I celebrated quietly.  It was my first day with no crutches, just the orthopedic boot.  I was so thrilled on the inside that I couldn't do anything but smile today.  These little victories keep me going and keep me motivated.

So here I sit writing another blog post.  Its now been 9 weeks since my surgery and I am so thankful that the worst part of this injury is now over.  I feel as though the clouds are starting to disappear and I can see the sun again.

I am only using crutches in the morning when I am bare foot.  Otherwise I use the orthopedic boot when at work or out running errands and then use sneakers when I am at home.  I have a pretty bad limp, but the ortho said it is just going to take time for that to disappear   But walking, even with a limp, is so thrilling I don't even care if people stare or how awkward it looks.

First and foremost I want to make it clear that I am so thankful that my injury was not worse, I know things can always be worse.  But, at the same token I am also acknowledging that this whole situation has been incredibly frustrating.  I am blessed that it wasn't worse, that I had an amazing surgeon, a wonderful physical therapist  and a huge support system of my family (especially my hubby) and friends.  But let me tell you......two months non weight bearing was AWFUL!!!  Thank God this nightmare is almost over!

I have always heard people when they say, "I just had a flash back." But I never really has experienced one until this past Sunday morning.  I was just sitting on the couch when my mind jumped back to the day I fell.  My mind took me quickly through all the events leading up to surgery, then through all the changes I have dealt with as far as living a semi normal life.  I snapped out of it and was never more thankful for all the blessings in my life.  Its funny because I was beginning to feel frustrated again and it was like my mind was reminding me of what I overcame.  After the "flashback" all the frustration left my body and I was happy go lucky again.

This injury has been a physical struggle, but the biggest battle has been the emotional one.  I read that it was going to be but didn't believe it until now.  The mind is the strongest most influential part of our being.  I was recently feeling like everything was going wrong and that it couldn't get worse, then it did.  But through this injury I have never felt more thankful and happier.  What I thought was the worst thing that could have happened has turned out to be the greatest blessing.  I asked God for strength and he gave me the opportunity to be strong.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Two Months Ago......

Exactly two months ago my life changed forever in a matter of seconds, literally just two seconds.  The morning I fell, and the two weeks after, I felt like all I was getting was bad news and that I would never be the same after this injury.  I felt sad, scared, worried, and confused about the future.  But now....two months after my surgery I am almost happy that this injury has happened, it has given me a new perspective on life.

I will start by saying that I do live everyday with pain, almost constant.  Every move I make involves some amount of pain.  Its not too bad, but uncomfortable and there are moments when I wish it would all go away.  However, I get stronger everyday, what bothers me in the morning many times is gone by night, at night I am very tired but that means I have been active during the day, and the pain I feel now will hopefully subside in the next months of physical therapy.  I was told today it will be 8 months before I am "healed", or as "healed" as this injury can possibly be.  But things look great and the physical therapist says I am really doing very well and seeing improvements each week.

I can now walk long distance in the boot with one crutch, short distance in the boot no crutch, and at home in a sneaker and one crutch.  These little victories are what keep me going and I am determined to get as much function as possible back in my foot.  There are moments where I wonder if I will ever make more progress, but then I remind myself of how far I have come in two weeks of therapy.  I started in a boot and both crutches and I am so close to being in a sneaker full time.

I used to only see the negative in situations and then stress about them.  I would worry worry worry and then worry some more.  I would be consumed with "what if" scenarios and then worry about things that may not even happen in the future.  Then I fell.  There is a silver lining with everything, sometimes you just have to look harder to see it.  I now see how strong I am physically, I see that I can overcome the challenges that life throws my way, I am a much stronger person emotionally than I ever believed I could be, and that staying positive really truly does work wonders.

Yes, of course there are negatives.  I have two screws in my foot that hurt like heck, I needed a scooter to get around for two months, I needed surgery and will have to have another, I have pain every day, my foot is swollen almost every second of every day, I walk funny and have to wear a crazy looking boot, and I could go on forever, but I won't.  I won't because I don't want to give the negative parts of this any attention, because what does deserve my thoughts are all the positives.

It is funny sometimes how God answers prayers.  I wonder if in some way this injury was placed in my life to teach me how to be calm, be still, be thankful, and how to find the good in every situation.  Because they are all things I was not good at before this.  But whatever the reason my scars and this injury will always be a positive memory for me of what I overcame and what I achieved.


Monday, September 17, 2012

Making Progress

7 weeks post surgery and 9 weeks post injury I am down to walking in the boot with one crutch almost full time.

Today was my second session of physical therapy.  The therapist said that most people have zero degree range of motion and I am at three degrees coming right out of the boot.  He is impressed with my range of movement and what I can do in such a short period of time.  ALL GOOD NEWS!

Given all the horror stories I have read online about these lisfranc injuries, I must say I am doing remarkably well.

This week has been the best yet!  I am walking up and down the stairs with the aid of crutches, and now that I am down to one crutch I have one hand free!  I feel so much more independence!  I felt for the longest time that this day would never come.  I feel so great, am in such good spirits, and feel so blessed to have amazing doctors to be treating me.

When I went to the doctor's office at six weeks post injury, I had no clue what to expect.  I was even more nervous visiting the pt for the first time, but all has turned out great.  I whole heartily believe that it has been the positive attitude that has made all the difference.

I can't wait for the one year anniversary where I can blog for the last time and hopefully post that I am a success story!

Started off non weight bearing on a scooter, then in the boot using two crutches, now down to the boot and one crutch!  Progress made!

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

I AM WALKING!!!!!

Well, I got great news!  Looks like being positive, optimistic, and listening to the doctors orders have paid off!  I am WALKING!!! 

I took my first steps in over two months today.  Exactly 6 weeks and one day after my lisfranc surgery. 

It is a crazy wierd feeling.  The doctor explained that enough time has gone by and that no more healing will occur.  Ligaments need 21 days to heal and I have given them 43.  It is as healed as its ever gonna be.  Now I will begin a month of physical thereapy and the doctor thinks I will be in sneakers and out of the moon boot in 4 weeks.  Much sooner then we originally thought!

So when the doctor left the room I picked up the crutches (my husband then took immediate advantage of the scooter) and then I pasued...........I had forgotton how to walk!  The first few movements were so scary, then I took these little tiny steps until my husband finally said, "umm you put one foot in front of the other."  Then I was like , "oh yeah!" 

Its slow going, and some steps are painful, others arent, but it feels so good to be moving again.  As the night has been progressing I can go a little faster and I am getting used to my "sea legs" for lack of a better phrase. 

I cried for 15 minutes after we left the office, I was just so happy.  There has been so much bad news that it overwhelmed me to get good news.  Sitting on the couch the day after surgery I felt like this day would never come.  But it did, God gave me the patience I needed and I pushed through.  I have never felt stronger then I do now emotionally. 

The doctor said walking with the hardware in will be painful and I am sure physically thereapy will not be pleasent.  But every pain I feel is a reminder of how strong I am, what I have gotten through, and a big reminder that I am walking again. 

I am on my way to being a success story!!!!!!!!

Monday, September 10, 2012

6 Weeks Post Surgery, 8 Weeks Post Injury

Here I sit the eve of my big doctors appointment.  Tomorrow I will be examined and it will be determined if I am allowed to begin learning how to walk again..........

I pray and hope that I have not done any damage, and that I have healed successfully.  The future of how much movement and how strong I will be from now on in unknown, and the unknown is very scary.  I have done my best to stay positive and optimistic, I hope that it has done me well.

I will stay true to my word and will be thankful for whatever my new normal becomes.  I will work hard and do exactly what my doctor and physical therapist tells me to do without missing a beat.  And...if tomorrow I am told that I need a few more weeks I will listen and be thankful regardless.

My foot looks good, less swelling each day, it doesn't turn that awful shade of purple when hanging down anymore. Now it just turns a reddish color.  I am not as sore at the end of the day, can bend and flex without much pain, and the incisions are looking good.  Physically I believe all has gone well.

Emotionally I have more good days then bad, I push through the bad and do my best to make them good again.  I am so happy to be at the end of the 6 weeks non weight bearing. It is really frustrating not being able to be independent and do all the things I am use to doing.  Thank God I have the amazing husband that I do.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't scared of what the doctor will tell me tomorrow, but no matter what the news I will be OK, and I will be a SUCCESS story.